This swimming opinion is anonymous, but comes from a DI head swimming coach.
I’ve been in the coaching world for the past 15 years of my life. I married shortly after graduation and my wife and I decided to start a family very soon after. Climbing the coaching ladder through those years, I’m now a head coach at a college.
Both of my children have been around a competitive pool their entire life. It was how they could spend time with dad during the crazy hours that go into coaching. Eventually that grew into them swimming for the local swim club. There have been so many times I’ve thought, Man, I should write a blog about this. Well, here is my first attempt.
It’s ironic that the few “free” weekends during the college season amazingly line up with my own children having their swim meets. So with a little self-talk, I whole heartedly make an attempt to go and watch my children and just be their dad. For those that have been in this situation, you realize that it’s impossible. It’s impossible from a public perspective because there are a lot of coaches that know who you are and want to talk to you about their up and coming swimmer. There are parents that will come up to you as well and ask what I think about their 13 year son. All of that comes with the territory of your position you hold, but it’s the other side of things that eats at you: The coaching instinct. You immediately start watching what other coaches are doing and, you watch what your child’s coach is doing, then you bite your lip and feel the tension build. More times than not, you make the right decision to bite your tongue.
I’ve read a number of parenting articles along the way and remember one where they suggest 3 simple statements prior to a competition and 3 questions after.
Prior to the meet
Do your best, have fun, and I love you.
After the meet
Did you do your best? Did you have fun? Followed by “I love you.”
I may or may not be off on the last one but with two daughters, it’s an important one for me to add in.
I’ve been pretty solid at letting things go as a dad/coach with my children. During their early years, my wife and I would let them decide at our Sunday family meetings what days they would go to practice. We held them accountable to that for the most part and it let them decide their commitment. I think that has been pivotal in where they are now. Yes, they are still very young (7 and 10) but they both make the decision to go to practice 5 days a week.
SIDENOTE: From an age group perspective both of my children have horrible birth days as they will age up prior to their seasonal championship every year (my oldest for long course season and my youngest for short course). Last summer I saw the phenomenon that has slowly been creeping into age group swimming again. I saw it with the full body suits back in 2007-2009, and now I see it again. I’m going to championship meets and seeing 8, 9, 10, 11 year olds in kneeskin suits. When I coached club my standard for the senior athletes I coached (and their parents) on when they should invest in a full body suit was after they made their sectional cut. To me, that was the mark. You’ve hit this higher level of competition, now let’s move on to a higher level of suit.
Now I’m not trying to bring down the swimsuit industry in any way, but I can’t grasp my mind around this. This is also coming from an individual that is so competitive that I do not believe in the whole “let your kid win” theory. That’s in anything, board games, card games, who can eat the most chicken wings, laps in the backyard pool. If there is going to be a winner and a second place finisher, I am going to do everything I can while I am physically and mentally able to win (from a counseling/psychological approach to things, I’m sure I have my older brother to thank for that character trait).
Why are parents spending 200, 300 or 400 dollars on a suit that with any normal growth in these developmental years is NOT going to fit when long course season rolls around? Is that blue ribbon valued so much? Is it the same as the cell phone craze? Suzy, Annie, Sally and Betty all have the suits/phone then my precious should have one too.
So there I was last night on a web-based swim shop. My oldest daughter has her short course state championship next week. She’s seeded well in her events — which always makes dad a little proud but also anxious. Again, she trains well. She’s committed to her workouts. Let’s let this play out. I’ve told her once she makes a zones team or sectionals we will get the kneeskin. Why change, right?
Then I start visualizing what I’m going to see. I’m going to see my first born daughter behind the blocks with 7 other girls in kneeskins. Is this any different than my stance on not letting her have a cell phone until she’s 12? This is competition, I like to win, and my oldest daughter has picked up that trait from me as well. BUT she isn’t on the same playing ground…is she? For those that have worn these suits, regardless of level, we all realize the more fabric you have on the better things will go. So I start looking at the suits more and justifying in my head. Well this kneeskin actually costs less than the other non-kneeskin technical suit. What’s the difference right? Everyone else is going to have it on? All her classmates have cell phones?
My inbox last night has the order confirmation for a new racing suit for my daughter…..
There is nothing wrong with a 7 year old wearing a knee skin assuming she is comfortable in it. As a parent, you always want to give your child all the advantages possible. No way I want to throw my daughter in race with an aquablade while everyone else has a kneeskin…. sort of like throwing a kid into a football game without a helmet.
The only way to stop knee skins is for the LSC not too allow it in competition…… otherwise I think coaches and critics should step aside…. and let the kid wear what she wants to wear and be on a level playing field with her peers.
I personally like knee suits on girls. We buy them from eBay and never spend over $50 for them. I purchase them for my 12y old daughter for several reasons. They fit high on the neck, so water doesnt get into the suit and cause a drag. The other reason is modesty. They cover the girl up!! Racing suits allow their butts to hang out and the cut goes up the sides so high the chest almost comes out. The knee tech suit is durable, doesnt stretch out, is a modest fit for our young ladies who are around the public during meets. My daughter feels comfortable at public meets with her knee tech suit versus a racing suit. I… Read more »
This was my main reason for buying my daughter a cheap Yingfa kneeskin. The kids were swimming in the dive tank of the Commonwealth games pool in Victoria and there were 3 20ish males watching all the girls suggestively as they dove off the blocks (the spectators sit right above the blocks). Luckily my 9 year old got a provincial 11 and under A time at that meet so I said it was for that reason. Additionally she is tiny and finds she stays a lot warmer with the water repelling suit on. $39 US was worth it to me….
I’ve have a 10yo girl that is in Age Group swimming. I was skeptical about tech suits making a difference at the time. Like a lot of others, I wasn’t into this marketing hype of high end tech suits. Since then, my daughter has come very close in making Regional cuts. She was missing most of her cuts by 0.xx seconds, and has FSII (got it on sale for $90 at beginning of the season). To give her a motivation boost, I told her I would get her a high(er) end kneeskin tech suit if she made at least 1 Regional Cut. That motivated her and she hit one, 100BR. Hence, I kept my word and got her an Arena… Read more »
Great story. I am buying an entry level suite for my daughter (11) for the first time. We (both) just want to see its effects. If 2 seconds are eliminated I could see it being addictive. At the same time, a suite does not replace pool time which is what we talk about most, and nor should it take away from the plans for long term progress. She is not setting records (yet?) but she is chasing her motivational times and she knows she has a certain amount of time in each age group to do it.
Assuming we can find one that fits her correctly, I’ll post how things go.
Interesting note below from swimmom on covering up. I… Read more »
Our 8-year-old swimmer is a local swim champ. At the KZN Junior champs, she walked away with the female 13 & Under Victrix Ludorum trophy. We do not use skins as it is just too expensive. We do however, have a deal that she would earn herself a set of skins when she swims her first South African level 3 qualifying time. So we use it as a motivator.
At most swim meets she competes against girls of different ages with the best on the block and he old school type swim suit serves her well. It is important that kids do not start to depend on the cap, the goggles, the swimsuit but rather be confident about their… Read more »
I have a 16 year old swimmer and a 10 year old swimmer. Both girls. The 16 year old starting getting a kneeskin when she started making cuts and the coach allowed it. I think our coach would have a cow if 10 year olds starting show long up in kneeskins. Even now the older kids are only allowed to wear them for certain meets. My 10 year old shows promise and is highly competitive. She has JO cuts. Even still, her coach and I want her to focus on process goals not just time goals. I don’t know if at 10 they can differentiate the two if all of a sudden a kneeskin is thrown at them.
For our meets (LSC Champs, State, Sectionals, etc.) we only allow swimmers to wear their kneeskins if they make the final. They are, however, allowed to wear aquablades during prelims, but I view is as if they wear a regular competition suit during prelims and a kneeskin during finals, then their real potential shows
USA swimming should ban all the technical suits. Unfortunately, they probably won’t and therefore we are left with everybody coming up with ethical should and should not arguments on the subject based on their own perceptions and experiences. These are some of the realities of taking the high road, or imposing the high road on your kid by not giving into the “dark side” of the tech suits. Your daughter trains harder than other swimmers, beats those same swimmers at the standard meets when they all wear standard suits. The championships come along, other team members suit up in LZR tech suits, drop 3 or 4 seconds out of nowhere, beat your daughter, bump her from relays, leave her wondering… Read more »
Hoyt – the concept of “banning all technical suits” is harder said than done. Your definition of a “technical suit” is probably different than mine, and different than the coach down the street.
Growing up in the age of aquablades and fastskins, my parent’s policy was that I could get one once I started to plateau a bit. I ended up getting one for free as a part of my Zone meet when I was 11, which made it a moot point, but I still respect my parents for putting their foot down. It’s a lot more fun to drop time gradually so waiting on the suit can help ensure that that happens. With tech suits, it’s a little bit different since they make such a difference, but I think the attitude can be the same. I think buying your child a lower price point “tech” suit is a good compromise, because it… Read more »