Dear Swimming: Farewell From a Swammer

SwimSwam welcomes reader submissions about all topics aquatic, and if it’s well-written and well-thought, we might just post it under our “Dear Swimming” series. We don’t necessarily endorse the content of the Shouts from the Stands posts, and the opinions remain those of their authors. If you have thoughts to share, please [email protected]. Thanks to Arianna Dean for contributing this piece.

Dear Swimming,

I never understood the saying, “you don’t know a good thing, til’ its gone,” until I met you. For the past 17 years of my life, you have captured too many hours to count, torn me apart and then built me back up, as well as given me the opportunity to become the person I am today. You came into my life and overwhelmed me with all kinds of aspirations. I wanted to go to 1:31 in my 100 Breaststroke (when I was 10), I wanted to go to the big Buffalo swim meet and wear the cool parka jacket, and I wanted to go first in my lane. At one point I wanted to go to the Olympics, I wanted to go to zones, I wanted to make it into finals, I wanted to make friends that I’d have forever, find coaches I could count on always, but most importantly I wanted to swim for a Division 1 NCAA program. You took me to places I never imagined.

I first met you at Jersey Wahoos and I swam there day in and day out (at least it felt that way) until I was 18. I loved you when I started at Wahoos and I loved you when I finished at Loyola. Looking back, the 4:20 alarm, 48-hour rule before meets, and saying  “no, I have swimming” and whatever else you didn’t allow me to do gave the love room to grow. I got up for you every single time because I made a commitment to that freezing cold pool, my teammates (my best friends), my coaches, and all those aspirations I had planned out in my head.  I continued at Loyola University Maryland. For four more straight years, I heard that early morning alarm. On top of schoolwork and my job, you took me way out of my comfort zone. However, you proved to me how strong I really am. You fundamentally molded me as a person. You provided me with the confidence I would need to survive out in the real world because the real world doesn’t slow down. My college career was not your normal college career; a lot of Friday and Saturday nights were spent inside watching Netflix and Sundays were spent playing catch-up on sleep, work, friends, and planning out the following week. How was I going to fit everything in? It was a struggle most days, but I continued to persevere because I knew it would be worth it. I accomplished my ultimate goal–to swim for a Division 1 NCAA program.

In freshman year, I thought about how much happier I would be with all the free time I would have if you weren’t involved in my schedule. Every time I thought about it, though, there was a place in my heart and voice in my head that said, “you can’t do it.” I remember the last first practice of my career and I felt like the end was so far away. I felt like I was ready for it to be over but now in the blink of an eye it is gone.  It is hard to believe it has come to an end. After all the work I had put in, there was no giving up. So thanks to the motivation, drive, and encouragement from myself, parents, boyfriend, friends, and family I now have a check mark next to my swimming career as a Division 1 NCAA athlete.

Honestly Swimming, I owe you so much more than this letter. There is no way any words could ever thank you for what you have done for me and for who you’ve allowed me to become. You have put me in and gotten me through some of the most trying times in my life thus far. I’ll miss you forever, but I’ll have you always. Once a swimmer, always a swimmer- I’ll never forget the dreams, memories, and love you have let grow in my heart. I know it will never stop growing.

Love,

A Swammer