Why 3rd Place at Olympic Trials is a Good Thing

At the U.S. Olympic Trials, first is first, second is first, and third is last. For the country’s elite, there’s one goal at that meet: making the Olympic Team. Everything else is either gravy or heartache.

Seeing swim stars and Olympic champions like Cullen Jones, Matt Grevers and Tyler Clary touching third hit me in my chest. The pain was physical, sharp pinpricks, dissipating to a dull ache that passed through my body.  The experience, simply witnessing it as a fan, was not fun.  I understand it intimately.

Over three Olympic Trials, I was “last” twice. And by last, I mean third.

In 1992, I got third in the 200 free final with a 1:49.05.  I turned in a 1:48.83 in the prelims (we didn’t do semis back then). If I’d swum the same time at night, I would’ve added another individual event to my schedule behind the 100 and 200 butterfly.  Getting on the 4×200 free relay, however, softened the blow.

In 1996, I got third in the 200 butterfly. After 14 consecutive national titles in the event, the shock was so abrupt that I felt numb sitting there in the water.  My energy drained as I hung from the lane line, the water turning chilly and cold. I remember thinking, ‘How am I going to climb out of the pool?’  I had no strength. Then it occurred to me, Why am I not crying?  If you ever deserved a good cry, touching the wall third at Olympic Trials is it.  I wanted to cry.  I wanted to feel something other than the complete lack of my own life-force.  Tears would’ve been a welcome release.  I felt nothing.   The end of that swim, and my career, felt like death.

Happy, joyous memories feel soft, almost intangible, like a beautiful impressionistic painting.  Painful memories have rough edges and grooves.  Recall is easy, the feeling of discomfort immediate.

20 years later, I remember that third place US Olympic Trials finish more acutely than winning Olympic gold, but here’s the weird part, the twist: I appreciate that third place finish, the one that ended my career, almost more-so than the swims that put me on the Olympic Team 4 years earlier.

ONE

Within days I felt relief–deep lung-emptying, mind relaxing relief.  I’d mortgaged my life to the sport.  I was ok with that. It was my choice, and I had done the work. I was ready for it to end…even if I didn’t realize it at the time.  The long taper, as some call retirement, is a pleasant experience once you lean into it.

TWO

After experiencing that anvil-on-the-chest, heartbreaking disappointment, nothing scared me.  I knew I could handle failure and be ok.  Being comfortable and so intimate with the experience of failure was freeing.  Since then I’ve never worried about failure, and it has allowed me to rush out and drink up the world with so many great experiences.

THREE

Now, many years later, I love that I have experienced every facet of the sport.  Winning? Frankly, that’s easy. Training goes well, taper is hit spot-on, and everything falls into place.  When you’re on, in the flow, everything is effortless.   When you’re off and work is harder and sluggish and painful, you muddle through still giving it everything you’ve got.  Swimming, as we all know, is an unforgiving sport.  Sometimes you struggle, even torture yourself mentally and physically only to fall short.  If that isn’t enough, you then deal with the guilt of letting everyone down that has supported you.   Until my last Olympic Trials, I didn’t fully understand that experience. I witnessed it watching my teammates and competition, but I didn’t know the heartache.  After the ’96 Trials I had a deep compassion and empathy for my peers and for everyone that invests so much of their life in this sport.

In This Story

34
Leave a Reply

Subscribe
Notify of

34 Comments
newest
oldest most voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Just Another Opinion
8 years ago

“Winning? Frankly, that’s easy. ”

A point most people miss throughout life. Dealing with success isn’t nearly as challenging (nor nearly as important to your long term well-being) as dealing with disappointment.

bobo gigi
8 years ago

2 for Jack Conger this year. But the qualification for the relay will console him.

bobo gigi
8 years ago

Who has the biggest number of 3rd places in US olympic trials history?

Admin
Reply to  bobo gigi
8 years ago

bobo – there’s a good article on near misses in the Olympic preview issue of SwimSwam Magazine. 😉

bobo gigi
Reply to  bobo gigi
8 years ago

In the most recent years I’ve Haley McGregory in mind.
It’s really awful.
2004
100 back 3rd
200 back 3rd
2008
100 back 3rd after breaking the world record in semis
200 back 3rd

oof
Reply to  bobo gigi
8 years ago

Haley swam on my club team when she was younger. I didn’t know her because she was a bit older than me, but we all watched in 2004 and 2008… it was rough. I still feel bad for her.

Uberfan
8 years ago

“If you’re ain’t first you’re last”-Ricky Bobby

James
8 years ago

Every swimmer reaches this point…for some it just so happens not to be at the Olympic trials just out of reach of the team. I started swimming when I was 7, swam my last race when I was 18. I won’t say I trained like some of these elites do, but I endured through plenty of “2 a-days” and cold morning swim practices in an attempt to shave those hundredths of seconds down towards an unclear end.
Fortunately I’ve found masters swimming in my “later life” that brings a sense of continuity to what I started those couple decades back.

Masters Swimmer
Reply to  Gold Medal Mel Stewart
8 years ago

Never to late to start again?

Hswimmer
Reply to  Gold Medal Mel Stewart
8 years ago

I thought Greevers said he was retiring?

Gramps
8 years ago

Mel, can you confirm or deny the story that JT’s response to the first one was… remember this feeling next time you want to take it easy.

P.s. chicks dig hardwood floors.

Billy
8 years ago

Hey Mel, let’s get real here. Very few humans possessed the raw natural talent for swimming that you did. What did you swim the 200 fly going what, 4-90 minute training sessions a week at the JMY under Coach Miss Frankie? A 1:46? And this was before you even went off to Mercersburg and swim for JT.

It’s easy for you to say these things, after being on top of the swimming pyramid with World Records and World Championship and Olympic gold medals. What about the swimmers that get third and nothing better that have to go home and do something else?

BTW, whats Coach JT up to these days? I swam against him as an age grouper as a… Read more »

SwimEagle
Reply to  Gold Medal Mel Stewart
8 years ago

Glad to hear JT seems to be back on track. I worked a few of his camps at Mercersburg straight out of high school and he and the experience in general inspired me to become a coach.

About Gold Medal Mel Stewart

Gold Medal Mel Stewart

MEL STEWART Jr., aka Gold Medal Mel, won three Olympic medals at the 1992 Olympic Games. Mel's best event was the 200 butterfly. He is a former World, American, and NCAA Record holder in the 200 butterfly. As a writer/producer and sports columnist, Mel has contributed to Yahoo Sports, Universal Sports, …

Read More »