Ocean Or A Puddle: A Poem

Courtesy: Lauren Clark

Water has always drawn me in.
And now as I watch the currents flow in,
the tide coming closer,
I want nothing more
than to drown in it.
To leave this world behind
in the one thing
that has always brought me tranquility and happiness.
I want the thing
that gave me so much life
to slowly take it away.

And yet everyday,
I never commit.
Jumping into water every morning,
I jump into a compound that
can sustain life,
but also take it away.
And with every bit of strength I have left,
I choose to let the water
sustain the little will I have.

It’s like slipping on a pool deck,
realizing you have a problem.
And it feels the same
reaching out for help.
The difference is
realizing you have a problem is
the heart drop,
and reaching out for help
is the impact.
The tremendous hurt,
before it eventually fades away.
And the embarrassment,
well that’s like the part
that will never leave you.

I try to appreciate
the little things.
Post afternoon practice,
I watch the sunset,
reminding me
it is never too late
to start again.

And like a sunrise,
I wake up every morning
to a new day.
To another chance.
And with each passing day,
jumping into the cool water,
pushing myself to the limit
in a healthy way,
with help from others,
things are getting better.

This summer,
as I watch the currents flow in,
the tide coming closer,
I want nothing more
than to swim in the water.
To see all the life it has to offer.

It doesn’t matter whether you drown in an ocean or a puddle, you still drown.

ABOUT LAUREN CLARK

Lauren Clark, also commonly known as Clarkie, is currently in her sophomore year of high school, and “probably my 10th year of competitive swimming”.

“I REALLY wanted to be a mermaid when I was younger. I swam for RMSC for a bit, then NCAP for 8 years of my life, and now once again I’ve moved back to RMSC. I love to read, paint my nails, try to learn French, and the obviously given, swim. In the future, I’m not exactly sure where I want to go to college, but I’d love to become either a forensic pathologist or an entrepreneur. Also, oatmeal is the best food.”