12 Ways To Know If “You Might Be A Swimmer”

by SwimSwam 0

January 19th, 2018 Lifestyle

Courtesy of Matt Keller

Many of you are probably familiar with Jeff Foxworthy’s “You Might Be a Redneck…” comedy routine. Enjoy this riff on it for us swimmers!

  1. If your hairdresser has ever made a funny face and said: “Ohhh, do you swim?”… You might be a swimmer.
  2. If you’ve ever wondered why the first step of the directions for Ultra Swim Shampoo says “Wet your hair”… You might be a swimmer.
  3. If you’ve ever licked your arm and smelled it because you missed the smell of the pool… You might be a swimmer.
  4. If your hair has ever frozen… You might be a swimmer. (bonus points if it also broke off!)
  5. If you can understand: “Tenfiftiesonthefortyfiveoutsmoothbackfastleaveonthebottom”… You might be a swimmer.
  6. If it has ever taken you more than 30 minutes to put on a swimsuit… You might be a swimmer.
  7. If the buffet manager at the local restaurant has ever cried when you walked in… You might be a swimmer.
  8. If you’ve ever failed to recognize a friend because they had their clothes on… You might be a swimmer.
  9. If the term “dolphin dives” has ever brought a smile to your face and it isn’t because you are thinking of a cute animal swimming in the ocean… You might be a swimmer.
  10. If you are dangerous to yourself and others on land… You might be a swimmer.
  11. If you learned how to stretch just so you can apply lotion to the middle of your back… You might be a swimmer.
  12. If you’ve ever swum farther than you can run… You might be a swimmer.

About Matt Keller

Matt Keller…might be a swimmer. In fact, he has been a competitive swimmer since age 7 and over 40 years later still can’t get enough of the sport. He is also the inventor of Firebelly, an innovative bone conduction audio swim performance monitor that helps swimmers improve their swimming and keeps them motivated. He is very excited to combine his passion for swimming and technology and give something back to the sport he loves.

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